A few months ago, I had a horrible bug in my stomach. I spent most of the day feeling sick, knowing I was going to throw up. It wasn’t going to be fun. Since when is puking fun? Or educational? Anyway, I remember sitting on the toilet (yes, it was coming out both ends) when I had the thought that would help shape what I was going to do after I was done being sick.
I have no idea how I contracted this wretched bug. I was laying in bed trying desperately to go to sleep. My stomach have been feeling queasy for the latter part of the evening. I was thinking, NO, this cannot be happening. I have TOO much to do! My son had a soccer game the next morning. I had invited some family over to celebrate my mom’s birthday. My mom was to drive down early the next morning to ensure that she could watch Ethan’s game. I hadn’t even cleaned the house yet! And here I lay in bed with the lights out, knowing full well that I would not be getting the sleep that I needed and I was going to have to figure out what to do with tomorrow’s events in the morning.
So I got up and did what any sane person would have done. I hopped online. I thought, I know that if I can just distract myself, I can get through this, no big deal, so Amazon Prime here I come!!! I got my show queued up, my headphones plugged in (so i wouldn’t wake the hubs), and my peppermint essential oil. I was set!
I will spare you and not share all of the nights events, BUT I did want to tell you the lesson I learned in between “sessions”. I was sitting on my throne, aka the toilet, thinking and praying PLEASE GOD DON’T LET ME THROW UP! I know that I needed to get rid of whatever was troubling my stomach, but I despise throwing up!!! So, as i was seated on my throne, I had a thought…isn’t this just like how I live my life? I know what needs to to happen, but I don’t want to do what needs to be done to feel better. Because honestly, having to go through tough things that are painful and seem like they hurt you isn’t high on my list of things to do. I know that doing the thing(s) that I have been putting off for X amount of time is going to help me, BUT I don’t want to do it because it’s tough and I don’t like being uncomfortable.
You see, I started my own business a few months before this. I got my website semi up and running, but then life happened. I know that life happens, but man, I was riding on this roller coaster of emotions because I knew that I had an opportunity to change my life and I was just letting life push me around. I was frustrated because I knew that I was not setting my life up for success.
Here I was on the toilet, praying not to throw up and knowing full well that that was the very thing I needed to do to make me feel better. Then a thought came into my mind, how you do anything is how you do EVERYTHING. I couldn’t even escape myself when the matter of puking was upon me! I am an avoider. Which, if you knew me (ask any member of my family), they would not peg me as an avoider. They would say the complete opposite. I know that when I have to go through the pain of growth, I do try to avoid for as long as I possibly can. I find EVERY sound logical reason on why things in that area of my life are the way they are.
I am making a claim right now. I CHOOSE how my life is lived. And I choose to be obedient to God, love my husband and have the healthiest marriage on earth and raise my children to be amazing adults that change this world!!